Time flies, while also standing still. Southern India.

Everyone tells us we've had the easiest of introductions to India. Kerala is where people come to recover from the stresses and strains of the north, the sights, crowds, rubbish and touts are absent from the south-west and the result is people say they are happier and more relaxed here.
After six days we couldn't agree more, in fact it took us some time to feel like we'd left Sri Lanka, the flight was so short, the climate and people so similar. Varkala the beach resort we headed to, felt like a busier version of Sri Lanka, although the beaches weren't half as nice. As it turned out, traveller-friendly Varkala was a little too dull for our tastes, everything was too easy, so we were pleased to leave the limbo and head for the infamous backwaters.

The backwaters are India's version of the Norfolk Broads, with Alleppey playing the part of Wroxham, they even have the same weed issues, in their case it's from Africa and while they don't have cider, they do have duck-herders, which is the next best thing to duck punts*. It was here we were planning to spend our next two days.

At this stage Mrs B. played the honeymoon card (which is plastic) and we went for the pricey fifty pounds a day boat, as it turned out we shouldn't have worried, neither of us can think of one hundred pounds better spent. For the next two days and nights we cruised the canals and broads, doing nothing but watching the banks slip by and being waited on hand and foot; we ate, drank, slept and read to our hearts content. We couldn't do anything to help, it was so ludicrously self-indulgent, we just lounged around as three people worked hard to ensure we were happy and if it wasn't for the fact the cook so obviously loved his job and the captain enjoyed being the boss, guilt could have set in.

It was so over the top, the relaxation was mind-numbing, time stood still, the end result was best described as stupefying. After four months of unemployment, it was on a house-boat in Kerala that everything finally stopped and although it's two months until we're back in the UK, we talked and thought about home more than we'd done before.

After the boat we hopped on a train to Fort Cochin and we've spent the last day or so planning how we get from here to Mysore to meet Patrick and Laura, without having to do an over-night bus journey. After all, it's a well known fact that an over-night bus journey is the most effectively serenity destroyer known to travellers, particularly those who are six feet and taller.

*All Norfolk references credited to Bruxner, G, sometime Norfolk pub-crawling, duck-punting champion (it's a small field, made up of just his close relatives).